This Murderer
by mutantfrogs
Summary: The Final Lair, through three different sets of eye. Musical based, specifically the 25th anniversary edition. So far Raoul and the Phantom's are up, Christine's will follow.
1. Raoul

Approaching the heart of this watery labyrinth, I hear the sounds of argument. Thank God Christine is still able to argue. I go as fast as I can, the weight of the blasted water slowing my feet.

I can see them. He's touching her. God help me, if Christine wasn't between us he would be dead already. Christine's in a different dress. My God, it's a wedding dress. What has that _thing_ done to her?

He sees me. This Phantom's even more hideous than I could imagine. How many has he murdered just for seeing his face? My brave Christine, my brave stupid Christine. How did we get to this point?

And then he's got her by the neck. That maniac, he doesn't even realize it. He's going to kill the one thing we both love, if you can even call his twisted obsession that, and he won't even realize it. What can I do? I feel like I'm drowning, like time has slowed all around me and I can't move, I can't breathe, all I can see is Christine in pain. That _bastard._ And then he let's her go. He tells me I can see her. Does this thing have some soul after all?

As I run to Christine, wanting more than anything to protect her from this monster, a realization hits me.

This is my fault. This is all my fault.

I should have listened to her. I should have taken her away the moment she started talking about her Angel of Music, no matter how crazy it sounded. I should have kept her in my sight every hour of the day.

I shouldn't have forced her into this hell-spawn's musical, into his arms.

But no, I was so entangled in my own desire to see him behind bars, or better yet, dead, that I put the only important person in my life directly into his path. I thought I could outsmart him, but instead I baited the trap with the woman I should have protected.

Now he has walked away with the bait, and as I listen to the sounds of the mob seemingly ages away, and feel my fiancé struggle to catch her breath beneath my arms, I realize we are completely, utterly alone. I am going to die, but not without doing everything I can to save Christine.

May I have God's forgiveness, because I certainly don't deserve her's.

* * *

_So this is ungodly short, but I haven't writted in a long, long time, and I thought the best way to get started was to try my hand at some drabbles. _

_I've found the 25th Anniversary Edition of Phantom to be incredibly inspiring. Sierra Bogess is wonderful, and Ramin, while not my favorite singer, does a very good job of portraying the emotions that have always appealed to me in Phantom. In fact, the emotion was the biggest draw. While the movie is visually beautiful, the 25th finally does justice to the sense of urgency, danger, and darkness that I always felt should have been brought to the front. _

_For me, this was most evident as far as Raoul was concerned. I know Hadley's performance was met with mixed reactions, and I understand both sides of the argument._ _Personally, I loved him. I'm a huge Hadley fangirl to begin with , but this really cemented it for me. Is he at times condescending? Yes, however, he's also an aristocratic male living in a time when the way he acted was considered proper. Also, HE'S WRITTEN THAT WAY. In fact, he's been toned down from the original script. It's up to the actors to chose how much they emphasize that. But beyond __that, it seemed like Raoul's actions stemmed from a fierce love of Christine, and a need to keep her safe. This is a girl who's already been through so much heartbreak in her life, and Raoul doesn't want her to have any more. While it takes him a while to be convinced someone really is pretending to be this girl's angel of music, once he has solid evidence before his eyes, his immediate reaction is to assess the threat so after it with guns blazing. I'm really drawn to Hadley's Raoul because he's not perfect, and in fact, at time's he's misguided, but he's doing what he's been trained to do to the best of his abilities. _

_So, if you read this, thank you, and sorry about that. I'm not good at expressing my emotions or opinions, but I just found this really inspiring. I'd love to hear your opinions on the 25th Anniversary performance. I might add some more drabbles to this depending on what feels like it needs to be told. __Thanks for reading!_


	2. Erik

My mother killed herself, did you know that?

No, you wouldn't. You never asked.

But she did. Got so tired of looking at my face that she hung herself. A rope around her neck, and snap! That's all it took. She didn't even wait till I had left the house. Of course, I wasn't allowed to leave the house, so that might have been why.

Some would say that's why I strangle people. Some would say it's because I crave power and dominance. I would say it's because it's fun. Try it sometime, Christine, and watch how buggy people's eyes get as they gasp, praying for any last breath of air.

The neck is a fascinating thing, isn't it? So vulnerable, so very exposed and vulnerable. Your neck, there in front of me, waiting to be squeezed, so vulnerable, exposed, there waiting, just squeeze, squeeze and -

I'm sorry. My Christine, I'm so, so sorry. This is why you can't stay. This is why you must run, run so far away from me, because I could snap and kill you any minute. I'm not normal, Christine. I love you, I love you so much, but I'm not normal, I'm selfish, evil, insane. Leave me now, before I really hurt you or -

Him. It's his fault, isn't it? Not mine, not mine at all, all his. I could control this before he came, but he makes me hate, makes me hurt. And you, you hug him and kiss him and I'm right here! Right here, Christine, but pretty boy makes you forget me! And look at him, I could have on his knees in a second, and then what would think, Christine, of your savior? He's not so special now, is he? Not when he's choking, not even able to save himself.

But why are you crying? Why are you begging and pleading? You should be happy! This is for us, Christine! This is because I love you.

This is so I never hurt you again.

* * *

_Where did that come from? I honestly have no idea. I was watching various performances on Youtube, and noticed the ones that drew me the most were the ones like John Cudia and Hugh Panaro, where the Phantom is truly so insane. So I started writing. This is the same scene, the final lair, from Erik's point of view. I might do one more, from Christine's POV, and make it a trilogy. But yeah, let me know what you think? Do you agree with this characterization? Who's you favorite actor? I'm still a huge fan of John Owen Jones. He's probably my all-time favorite._


	3. Christine

I remember after my father died, so many people asked me, "How are you?" I couldn't answer, because I felt nothing. I was in a living death, unable to do more than act out the motions. I have been so used to feeling nothing that I don't know how to describe myself right now. This must be what it's like to feel everything.

I am mad. I am so angry - at my father for leaving me here to deal with this. I was too young, I never knew how to take care of myself. I'm mad at Raoul for forcing me into that damned play, for using me as _bait_. I'm mad at Him, of course, for bringing me here, for expecting me to do this. I'm mad at Him for idolizing me, for thinking I deserve _this_. And I'm mad, I'm so mad at myself. I do deserve this hell. I've brought it down upon me. I should have ran the moment Raoul entered the lair. I shouldn't have let him leave me side, and we should have just gone.

I am sick. Literally, physically, nauseous with what's happening. Raoul is at the end of a rope, is probably going to die in front of my eyes. Why? Because of me. Because of my starved craving for attention, for playing women's games when I'm still such a girl. I'm sick with what He thinks I am. I sang that song for him, but how much of it was really me, and how much was Him writing his sick, selfish fantasy of what he thinks I am? I'm sick because I don't know.

I am devastated. I feel as though the opera house has come crashing down around me, and I'm suffocating under the debris. I'm going to die down here, I know it. Raoul will die, and I will die, and He will die, and all because I was so stupid, so selfish!

The one thing I'm not is afraid. He doesn't scare me anymore. His face is just that - a face. Who He is sickens me, but I don't fear him. If anything, I think I pity Him. He's at least as old as my father when he died. Yet He's never known love, never had a child on his knee or a wife's caresses. I imagine my life without Him or Raoul, without anyone, alone, always alone. My heart breaks for Him, for his selfish, childish twisted ways. Maybe that's why He chose me, because I was selfish and childish, because I was angry with the world. Perhaps there's more of Him in me than I care to admit.

At that moment, I think of Romeo and Juliet. How silly, I haven't read that in years. Perhaps I must take all His sins, all of His terrible crimes, to absolve them. Perhaps in the same way I might absolve my own.

I know what must be done now.

God forgive me for not realizing it sooner.

* * *

**Okay, side rant on Christine now. It sounds kind of stupid, but it just hit me today that when Christine sings, "Angel of Music, who deserves this?" she's not just talking about Raoul, she's talking about herself. It took me a while, I know. Anyhow, thinking about it more opened up this whole new characterization for me, completely different than the "naive, superstitious, possible crazy" characterization I usually give her. Suddenly, I was able to see her as a flawed, complete person, and that helped me to finish this drabble, which I've left unfinished for... a while. In my mind, Christine is a rather selfish, self-centered teenager who finds herself caught in an impossible situation, and is frightened. She's angry with the world, and only by learning to forgive can she grow. I'm not a Christine/Phantom shipper anymore, but I do think she loves him in a way. I believe she led him on, perhaps without even realizing she was doing it, because she was an attention starved teenager, and then realized she had made a huge mistake once she realized how dangerous he was. Does she even really love Raoul? Possibly, but she's young, and he was her first option out of a scary situation. And yet I still love her character. She fascinates me, and I wish I was a decent enough writer to attempt to write about her story after POTO, because I think it was probably remarkable. So forgive me for not being the best writer. This ended up being more of a character study for a story that I'd like to write in the future, though it's doubtful I ever will. I would, however, love to hear your comments on Christine.**


End file.
